How (and Why) to be Kinder
The act of being kind is often used as a synonym for being nice. While niceness implies pleasurable or agreeable behavior toward someone else, kindness takes niceness further. Kindness can be defined as a genuine and sincere way of giving your time and intention to someone else through compassion, time, generosity, and care for the betterment of helping others (Binet & Passmore, 2019).
Kindness can be shown in various ways. Some ideas may include offering emotional support, giving time to someone or a cause, showing respect, encouraging another person, providing resources, or just being there when someone needs you.
Research suggests that showing kindness makes the person we are being kind to feel good and helps our well-being.
The Benefits of Kindness
Below is a list of just a few benefits of kindness.
● Increases Happiness. Kindness has been shown to increase subjective well-being and improve mood. The more kind we are, the more we tend to feel positive emotions (Otake et al., 2006).
● It boosts social relationships. People who show kindness are more likely to develop genuine connections with others and feel content with their social networks (Otake et al., 2006).
● Promotes oxytocin. Oxytocin, commonly referred to as the love hormone, is a hormone that can support positive self-esteem. It helps us feel more joy and improves heart health by reducing stress (Verona, Murphy, & Breslin, 2018).
● Reduce depressive moods. Being kind to others can help you feel more self-confident and energetic, which can elevate your mood and help minimize feelings of depression (Carter, 2011).
● Produces the “Helper’s High.” We’ve heard the term running high, but have you heard of a helper’s high? Researchers have shown that our brain’s pleasure and reward centers fire when we do good deeds for others. Being kind can create a rush of positive energy and uplift us, a phenomenon called “helper’s high” (Dossey, 2021).
Kindness in Action
Picture yourself at the grocery store at 5:30 pm on a Friday. You’re ready to get home, change into comfortable clothes, have a bite to eat, and can’t wait to sit in front of the TV for movie night. Your grocery list is small, maybe just milk and eggs. But it seems like the entire population of New York City is in the same store as you, and you are beginning to grow impatient with the long lines. Of course, this is a frustrating scenario, especially when you’re exhausted from a long week of work. While it can be easy to give in to our annoyance or discomfort with the situation, being patient, smiling at another waiting customer, or being understanding of the cashier when they apologize for the long lines can mean more to them than you think.
In another situation, let’s say you have a great friend who is dealing with some trouble at work, feeling overwhelmed with her home life and hasn’t found the time to take care of herself. Your kindness can be as simple as checking in on her day, sending a warm message wishing her a good week, or listening if she needs to vent any frustrations or problems.
Let's Recap:
1. Kindness expands the more we share it; being kind to someone else can improve our psychological and physical health.
2. No act of kindness is too small.
3. Being kind is a simple but beneficial act that we often overlook. Hopefully, this article served as a reminder that just a little care and compassion can make a big difference.
References
● Carter, C. (2011). Raising happiness: 10 simple steps for more joyful kids and happier parents. Ballantine Books.
● Dossey, L. (2021). Generosity and kindness in our pandemic era. Paradigm, 19.
● Otake, K., Shimai, S., Tanaka-Matsumi, J., Otsui, K., & Fredrickson, B. L. (2006). Happy people become happier through kindness: A counting kindnesses intervention. Journal of Happiness Studies, 7(3), 361-375.
● Verona, E., Murphy, B., & Bresin, K. (2018). Oxytocin-related single-nucleotide polymorphisms, family environment, and psychopathic traits. Personality Disorders: Theory, Research, and Treatment, 9(6), 584.
A Little More Inspiration
And Finally!
Action Steps You Can Take Now
- Visit Life Vest Inside and Subscribe
- Visit Random Acts of Kindness and Get Involved
- Do Something Kind For Someone Today
